A Life Of Confusion

Kelly Geissler

Carson McCullers: A Life of Confusion

One may wonder why Carson McCullers wrote about such sad things as lonely adolescents, children dying leaving their mothers to mourn and people born with disabilities to categorize them as McCullers' term, "Grotesque." Why would anyone bring such sorrowful topics to the attention of readers? The fact is that Carson McCullers lived a strange life of suffering, chaos, and success. She wrote mainly to inform those who did not understand what some people were going through along with herself. By doing so she earned the respect as a compassionate and understanding woman. Those who did not know her could say she was different than other people from evidence of the life that she led. Through her writing, she told stories of those who were not brave enough to share themselves. Through her life, Carson McCullers experienced loneliness, sexual and emotional confusion, and pain that lead her to writing pieces of America's greatest works that will be cherished by all in a world she helped to bring closer together.

On February 19, 1917, Lamar and Marguerite Waters Smith became the proud parents of Lula Carson Smith. Marguerite would later realize what an important influence she played on Lula's life but not after her rebellious year at the age of thirteen, 5'8 *". She decided to go by her middle name, because she wanted to seek out a new identity, and her fascination with individuality played a role in her decision also. Carson grew up in Columbus, Georgia, where at an early age she was more fascinated with music than anything else (Hershey 2). Her mother was the main influence in her life that taught her all the basics of storytelling. She helped Carson to realize that she was different from everyone else and would be destined to succeed one day and make it to the top. Carson's mother was the one who had the talent of storytelling so when it was time for Carson to begin writing, most did not believe it was really she. Although their styles were completely different, both earned the respect of many intellectual readers. Mrs. Smith rearranged actual happenings into appealing parts whereas Carson based her stories on the sadness of her life. At the age of 17, Carson decided to take on the writer's life after hours of begging to go to New York. While on her way to register at Juilliard, Carson lost her and her roommate's tuition money on the New York City subway. She was forced to work jobs such as typing and waiting tables
(Kiernan 349).

Love struck Carson at age 20 when she was married to Reeves McCullers, Carson and Reeves took turns with writing their own stories but Carson's success brought a slight strain to the marriage. After about seven years, the sexual identities of Carson and Reeves became unknown, and both took on lovers of the same sex (Kiernan 350). Through this time in her life, Reflections in a Golden Eye was written. It was about two police partners who have affairs with one another's spouses and about their bisexuality; obviously the story line was a representation of the partnership between Carson and Reeves and their relationships with their lovers. The strain of the marriage greatly broke the tie that held the two together when Carson caught Reeves forging her name on checks in 1941. Although they were divorced, they were closer than ever emotionally (Kiernan 352). After a few years of talking and resolving their differences, Carson and Reeves were remarried in 1945.

The emotional pain of the divorce could not have compared to the pain that she went through the last few aching years of her extraordinary life. The McCullers were both heavy drinkers and abusive. On a trip to Paris, Reeves began to plan their double suicide. When the frightened Carson left Reeves in the hotel room, she left him forever. She came back to the states and never paid for his body to be buried or sent to her. When he was cremated, she did not pay for the services. The creator of The Carson McCullers Project, Danz, said "Reeves wanted her to commit suicide with him so she could share in his misery until the very end of their lives" (Online). If she had succumbed to recover his ashes, would the misery still continue?

It had all began when she returned to Columbus, Georgia in February of 1941. As if a reminder to the sadness this town brought, she suffered her maiden cerebral stroke. Through this catastrophe, she met and fell in love with David Diamond and so did her husband. The three of them lived together in New York, when Carson was not in Yaddo with Elizabeth Ames, her most trusted friend. Her physical condition shortly began to deteriorate sending her closer to her death. In 1961, she underwent two operations, 1962 included a surgery on her left hand and the removal of her left breast, and in 1963, her left leg was operated upon. An interesting point was created with all the morose operations to her left side; while pieces of her were becoming mended; her heart was falling apart. It is ironic that all of her operations were done to fix her left side, the side of her heart. Too bad one could not fix what needed the most healing. Finally in April of 1967 while vacationing in Ireland, she spent most of that vacation time in the hospital on a flotation bed. Four months later, she suffered a massive brain hemorrhage that sent her into a coma. September 29, 1967, Carson McCullers died at Nyack Hospital at the age of 50.

Many aspiring writers come to know that critics are not always pleasing and at some times discourage one from writing. Kiernan gives an example of the harshness that some critics produce towards Carson McCullers: The critics did not like this book (Reflections In A Golden Eye) as much as others saying "there is minimal lyricism to soften the readers understanding." They gave the book a review including "substituting caricatures" and "gratuitously sensational." (350)

Reflections In A Golden Eye brought many mixed reviews including those of Klaus Lubbers, Richard Cook, and even one of her dearest friends, Tennessee Williams. Richard Cook describes the book as being "a stark, blank world devoid of love and charm, where life exists on its lowest instinctual level"(69). This sums up the book because throughout McCullers' life, she had many people around her however she still felt the void left by her differences and oddities. Carson McCullers has a way of turning the tables on the reader to make them realize that they are the one with the uncertainty towards the "grotesque." Along with that, Cook has summed up what McCullers has tried to accomplish through her writing when he states "she has transformed human oddity from a mark of the individual personality into a sign of general human perversion" (69). Tennessee Williams explains that most critics did not understand why she dealt with subjects "so unwholesome" as the deaf-mute and half-wit (Bloom 11). This brings up an interesting point because most of society cannot understand McCullers' intentions in writing about the less fortunate human beings. According to a critic named Oliver Evans, "McCullers's truths may not be comfortable to live with, and though they may not even be truths, they are nevertheless the convictions at which she has arrived out of her experience…which are to that extent allegories and parables"(Bloom 22). So much emphasis has been brought upon the development of maturity to the everyday person that one could only begin to let their imagination flow and think of ways of becoming that better person and understanding what McCullers is trying to teach through her works. If one could only have known Carson McCullers as well as Tennessee Williams, many would finally realize that all she was asking for was a little compassion towards people less fortunate by letting the reader step inside the wondrous mind that created such powerful expressions of the soul. Williams always gave McCullers support in developing her stories, her life, and her pain. He once again spoke highly of her work and critics' attitudes towards it when he expressed this thought: "discerning critics should have found the opposite of a disappointment since in exhibited the one attribute when had yet to be shown in [her] stunning array of gifts. The gift of mastery over youthful lyrics is what seemed to draw her readers to the books of the daring subject"(Bloom 15). Unlike other critics, Williams really knew and understood where McCullers was coming from because of their closeness and being a writer himself.

The Member of the Wedding is based on adolescent discoveries that lead to the discussion of many topics. The main character is Frankie Addams who views herself as an "unjoined person" and "a member of nothing in the world" (McCullers 225). Kiernan tells us that Frankie joins the wedding of her brother so they can become what she calls "the we of me" (352). The point of the book is to make people realize that there is more to life than in what group you are included. Sometime however, it would be admirable to give some others a chance. Although this book does not represent the most horrid freaks--it is more freakish in spirit than in physical appearance--Frankie cannot find people to associate herself with, leaving her with the thoughts that she is indeed a freak. What other reasons would a "twelve and five-sixths" year old have to believe that she was any different? Barbara White explains that some critics tried to change the subject of the book to something totally different from what it is truly referring to. She claims that they turned it into isolation or "freakdom" avoided and argument of the sex of the protagonist (Bloom 127). White goes on to talk about how Frankie does not agree with the role that accompanies being a girl. She wants to be a boy-girl in the sense where she does not want to renounce the privileges of boys. As many will come to realize, it may seem most of McCullers' works about the unfair advantages to those superiors than the low-life and not so important other person. Carson McCullers wrote to express feelings that everyone at one time feels or felt. Her topics were and still are daring, so one could come to understand why all backgrounds wanted to read her masterpieces.

Although the critics did not give justice to McCullers' works, the reader comprehends and relates to her books. One example of the connection between the author and the reader would include "The Haunted Boy." McCullers uses many techniques of creating suspense but the best is when she hints about "the other time." No one knows what exactly she is referring to until they finish the short story (McCullers 667). To a reader, this could be the best method an author could use to draw people to their books.

"The Haunted Boy" is about a young boy, Hugh, who has grown up much faster than any child should ever be forced to. His mother tried to kill herself and unfortunately Hugh is the one who happened to discover her distressed body. The only person he remotely feels close enough to confide in is John, a schoolmate.

John and Hugh are very close despite their age differences. John is a sophomore and Hugh is a freshman. John is sporty, kind and smart; however, he is not a teacher's pet. He gives Hugh a chance and that is what lures him close to John. He is someone to relate with and by doing so earns the respect of Hugh's best friend (McCullers 660).

"The Haunted Boy" tosses many things towards the reader so it may be difficult to predict the outcome of the story. Throughout the story, one is led to believe that Hugh's mother has died because Hugh cannot find her. She never leaves the house without leaving a note under the pie or telling Hugh in advance. As time passed, Hugh became very uneasy with the idea of his mother missing but luckily, a few hours later after sharing very personal information with John, Hugh's mother returned after a rare day of shopping. Hugh was very upset with his mother because she never goes shopping and always wears the same clothing, so why change now one would ask? She made herself over because she needed a new look on life so her past will never be included in her future again (663).

Hugh's life as a young teenager embodies many different feelings of remorse, pain, and confusion. He once said his "heart is like a basketball, bouncing with glee down the hall"(663). As a reader, one could conclude that to Hugh, any happiness would mean the world to him so that is why he could open up to John. John's life was happy and never underwent the catastrophes that Hugh's family has endured. Despite what the critics have said, most readers could relate to this story and really appreciate it because besides what one could say, there are family secrets that you could not just tell anyone. This story is a down to earth and really a calm narrative fiction encounter for Carson McCullers to write.

The "we of me." What does that mean? To Frankie Addams, a character from The Member of the Wedding, it is about her life now and her life in the future. As a dysfunctional thirteen-year-old, just like McCullers in earlier days, Frankie finds it difficult to associate with anyone. When she finds out that her brother, Jarvice is being married to Janice; she wants to join the wedding because they all need each other. One could conclude that Frankie only wanted to marry into a certain group and the happiness that comes along with it. She also wants to change her name to Jasmine so she carryout the name scheme of the "Ja"(Wedding 224). Frankie discusses what she is going to do on Sunday with her brother:

I know that the bride and my brother are the "we" of me. So I'm going with them, and joining with the wedding. This coming Sunday when my brother and the bride leave this town, I'm going with the two of them to Winter Hill. And after that to whatever places that they will ever go. I love the two of them so much and we belong to be together. I love the two of them so much because
they are the " we of me". (Wedding 224)

Although Frankie's father does not play a very important role in this family, through the dialogue in the play, one could assume that he is watchmaker and jeweler. This play includes only a few characters that really mean anything to Frankie. By doing this, the reader can assume that the person only needs these selected few to make themselves happy but they do need some people to associate. This play displays the epitome of what teenagers go through at one time in their adolescent development. Between the disarray of where one belongs or with what to do to fit in to be looked upon as a popular kid, teenagers need someone to affiliate with. They need someone to give them advice and be there for each other when one needs it most. This benefit of a close friend is one unfamiliar to Frankie and was also to McCullers herself.

Just when things started to look hopeful, McCullers fell ill. To keep busy and stay within the motions of her once normal life, she decided to write about her experience that would closer lead her to her death. A Clock Without Hands is about a man who was recently diagnosed to leukemia. JT Malone takes over the role of this lonely druggist who looks to regain his misspent life. Judge Fox Clane takes over the as the father figure and guides him in his search for his lost years. The judge is set in ways of the old days. He wishes to follow the ways of the Old South but is also interrupted with the difficulties his own orphaned grandson is facing. Jester is naturally a directionally challenged adolescent with only the judge to learn from. With his strong social justice, Jester is always at ends with his grandfather so he goes along with Sherman Pew, the Judge's servant. Sherman is a very angry youth is also searching for his own identity but gets lost in the social disturbances. JT is critic of Sherman's appearance that leads him to believe that he is a freak:

He was a colored boy that Malone knew by sight and in his walks he seemed always to run across him. Or perhaps it was simply that he noticed the boy whenever he saw him because of his unnatural appearance. The boy was medium- sized with a muscular body and a face that was sullen in repose. Except for his eyes, he looked like any other colored boy. But his eyes were bluish-gray, and set in the dark face they had a bleak, violent look. Once those eyes were seen, the rest of the body seemed also unusual and out of proportion. The arms were too long, the chest too broad - and the expression alternated from emotional sensitivity to deliberate the sullenness. (11)

With this description, one could only wonder what it would be like living the life of a colored boy when that is how you would be viewed or living the life as a social freak for that matter. This book brings together the irony of and power of all works of life to the understanding of how to live you life in its entirety. The only way that JT finally found his youth was when he opposed Judge's plans of bombing Sherman's house (Kiernan 354). The sexual confusion of this novel includes feelings between Jester Clane and Sherman Pew. One thing that a reader could conclude about his reasoning of this reciting is the Judge wanted everyone to realize what each person has lost that was so sacred to them but still could not interfere with its departure after they completed their sin. Judge wanted Sherman to realize that if he thought before he made a decision, he could realize the outcome
before a problem would sprout. Despite the bad reviews of this novel, take into consideration the humor meant that is represented by Sherman and Jester.

Carson McCullers writes about a different world, a world of lost, wounded eternal strangers at the establishment of their racially biased existence. Her childhood and life throughout relates to her works. Her first love for the humanities began with music. She was always playing the piano just like the character Frances Bienchen from the short story Wunderkind. She is an outcast who finds music lessons as her spiritual retreat. However, at this point, her teacher is beating a dead horse with the amount of practice. Mr. Bilderbach is at the origin of the problem along with his wife, the Mrs. Bilderbach. Her hopes and dreams become clear when she is in as state of complete calmness. Nothing else in the world is of any importance to her as long as she is with her thoughts. At the stage she is now in her study of music, is similar to the stage when Carson made the change. This short story draws the reader along the same line of curiosity that Frances feels throughout the story. A picture is painted of two different feelings that she possesses. The piano practices is a picture of monotonous but releasing time and the times right before Frances goes to sleep when all of her thoughts and memories are brought together in a melting pot in her heart and mind. Mr. Bilderbach always calls Frances Wunderkind. This name is suiting to her since her immaculate sense of music
is refined in such a way that most would appreciate. This is one example of Mr. Bilderbach's reference to that name:

A Wunderkind-a Wunderkind- a Wunderkind. The syllables would come out rolling in the deep German way, roar against her ears and then fall to a murmur. Along with the faces circling, swelling out in distortion, diminishing to pale blobs- mister Bilderbach, Mrs. Bilderbach, Heime, mister Lafkowitz. Around and around in a circle revolving to the guttural Wunderkind. Mister Bilderbach looming large in the middle of the circle, his face urging-with the others
around him.

A Wunderkind- a Wunderkind. That was what Mister Bilderbach had called her
when, at twelve, she first came to him. Older pupils had repeated the word.
(Wunderkind 79)

Throughout one's study of Carson McCullers, it could be taken into consideration the importance of her life along with those lives that she writes about. If it was not important to McCullers herself, some of America's most desired novels and stories could not be appreciated. Though to some, her twisted stories grew to be in an elite configuration of Southern Grotesque writing. McCullers' writings are her art, art that is viewed by all to bring the imagination of all to a closer understanding.

Works Cited

Bloom, Harold. Modern Critical Views: Carson McCullers. Philadelphia: Chelsea House Publishers, 1986.

"Conformity in Reflections In A Golden Eye." Yahoo. com. Online. February 10, 1999.

Danz. Online. "Carson McCullers Project." February 16, 1999.

Hershey, A. "Carson McCullers." Online. February 4, 1999.

Kiernan, Robert F. " Carson McCullers." Concise Dictionary of American Literary Biography: The New Consciousness 1941-1948. Detroit: gale Research, 1987. 3. 347-357.

McCullers, Carson. Ballad of the Sad Café` and other short stories. New York; Houghton Mifflin Company, 1971.

McCullers, Carson. Clock Without Hands. New York, NY: Houghton Mifflin Company, 1998.

"McCullers, Carson." Discovering Authors. CD-ROM. February 118, 1999.

Miller, James E. Jr., Gonzalez, Duenas, and Millett, Nancy C, eds. Question and Form In Literature. Oakland, NJ: 1982. 222-225.

Miller, James E. Jr., Wood, and Cardenas de Dwyer, eds. The US in Literature. Oakland, NJ: Scott, 1989. 659-667, 748-753.